oF gEnTlEmEn AnD pImPs: The Rewrite
by TheRoseRedReaper
Summary: A story in which Gamzee is a proper gentlemen despite his off setting face paint, Tavros is overconfident and loud mouthed, and gets ALL the b*tches. These two gets paired on a school assignment, in which Tavros complains about being paired with a know-it-all, to which Gamzee interrupts by cleary stating "Stop that, I may swoon." It goes downhill from there. T for language.
1. Enter: The Gentlemen and The Pimp

(A/N): OK. So. Yes, I am rewriting this story, BUT, the gist of it is the same, a few things are going to be repeated, but I am going to add "meat and potatoes" to my writing as my Language Arts teacher would say. She really is the best. Also, don't expect fast updates until school ends because I have EOCs coming up this week and next week so I'll be under lots of tedious studying in the meanwhile. If that wasn't bad enough I have limited time to write this. However, worry not, I will work on this story/ rewrite every chance I get. Once again, I hope you all remeber that is a no Sburb, human, highschool, and opposite peronality AU. Wow that's a mouthful.

Disclaimer: I don't own Homestuck.

Without further ado, onto the rewrite. (Honestly, I'm a bit nervous about this and hopes that it comes out with the best of my abilities shining through.)

* * *

"Gamzee! Up and at 'em! Time for your first day of high school!" Kurloz chirped, already bustling about the house, and as talkative as ever. Gamzee huffed and gently lifted a dusty volume off his face, wincing slightly at the sunlight filtering in through the thread bare curtains of his room. Gamzee sleepily unfurled himself from his messy horn and book pile, blindly reaching for his spare glasses. He sighed, regretting pulling that all nighter the previous evening to finish a sci-fi novel all about a species of alien called "trolls" in the book playing a game called "Sburb" with a few humans a couple of years younger than him, as he slowly dressed into his recently bought uniform. It humoured him that his name was the same as one of the trolls, yet their personalities were complete opposites.

"Hm…what is for breakfast?" Gamzee inquired as he walked down the stairs into the heavily disorganized living room. His father called it "organized chaos", but Gamzee called it "the forager's nest" behind his father's back.

"Bacon and eggs, sunny side up!" Kurloz practically sang, already setting a plate for his younger brother down on the table.

"Hm…thank you, Kurloz." Gamzee mumbled while he hurriedly ate his breakfast, a bit annoyed that Kurloz threw out his alarm clock again and didn't bother to wake him up in place of it. He really did not understand what it is that Kurloz has against alarm clocks. Silently washing his plate in the sink after he finished his breakfast, Gamzee mused about school. Ninth grade. The year every Makara dreamed of. NOT. They all, except Gamzee, detested school.

Shrugging on his messenger bag and downing his daily glass of Faygo, Gamzee prepared to head out, groggy and feeling like death warmed over. Usually he was always excited for school, but that all-nighter is really starting to get to him.

"Whoa there little bro, you didn't motherfuckin' brush your teeth, and ya forgot your contacts!" Kurloz exclaimed, dragging Gamzee to the bathroom. Depleted of energy from being dragged by his over-caring elder brother, Gamzee sighed once again and slowly brushed his teeth, not caring anymore about missing the bus.

"Sighing can make you lose happiness lil bro." Kurloz 'tsked', not entirely sure if he quoted that right, but still wanted the message across to his little brother who was usually happy about school. Gamzee frowned at him and mumbled a short apology and applied his face paint, agitated but glad that Kurloz had reminded him to brush his teeth and put on his contacts, as he had nearly forgotten to put on his face paint. Gamzee felt much better under his guise of face paint; he felt judged and exposed without his face paint and with his glasses on. He shivered involuntarily as he put in his contact lenses as he remebered the taunting comments that followed him throughout fifth, sixth, and eigth. As he started walking to school, he had a sinking feeling that it's going to be a long day.

* * *

Having arrived at school, Gamzee followed the school map handed to him by one of the school officials to his homeroom, reading over his scheldule while he was at it. Homeroom, he had some old geezer known as Dr. Smith, but as he heard the surrounding students whisper dissapointedly at getting him for a teacher, he quickly learned that was more commonly known as Doc Scratch. For first period, he had for art, which he pleasently smiled at, for he had helped before and helped her for community service hours for middle school graduation requirements and had formed a wonderful friendship with her. Continuing down the list, he had for Algebra 2 second period, for Chemistry third period, fourth period World History, for fifth period Technology, and some guy scratched out for some reason in Sixth period. Maybe it was a misprint in the office? He'd ask later.

Sitting down in a random seat, not really glancing at the other students, he cringed slightly as Doc Scratch droned on and on in his definitely scracthy voice about classroom rules, school procedures, a rant of how students don't bother wearing the uniforms properly anymore. a rehearsed speech on the decline of manners in students, and not single word else on what exactly the block schelduling for the day was and what they're supposed to do in homeroom by the time the bell rang. That sinking feeling of a long day came back to Gamzee full force.

* * *

Trudging to fourth period, Gamzee felt terribly weighed down by the tedious paperwork and speeches of classroom rules and procedures always given out by all the teahcers the first and second days of school. It was a long day so far. At least he only had one class until school let out for the day. Setting down his things and sitting in a desk by the window, Gamzee patiently waited for the bell to ring and for class to begin. That patience however soon turned into agitation as spent the next ten minutes role playing away on her smart phone before noticing the arrival of her class with a snobbish sigh and stood, clearing her throat in an obnoxious manner that said that she didn't like the students and that they probably wouldn't like her either.

"Alright class, settle down and stop talking. I'm sure you've heard the other classes talking, and yes, I am going to assign you all a project. So shut your traps and listen! I'm not going to repeat myself." glared as if issuing a challenge. She took a breath and explained the project in practically one go.

"I am assigning you all a culture project; you will have partners of course, and learn more about each other through this project. Here's there paper with the detailed instructions, your partner is marked on your paper, start your project, you have two months to come up with a decent five page report, you're also getting grading for the completeness of the paper and how well you work with your partner; now leave me alone, I'm going to watch my one o' clock drama!" huffed with a flourish of her trench coat, she settled herself behind her computer and proceeded to ignore her students to watch her drama, muttering under her breath about shipping charts and who knows what. How did she even kept her job? The students will probably never know.

Gamzee looked down at the paper she had thrown at the students at random, quickly scanning it. He was paired with a gentlemen named Tavros Nitram. Gamzee glanced over at Tavros, who was wearing his shirt untucked under his school vest, Mohawk a little messy, delicate eyebrows furrowed, brown eyes wonderful, and his smallish mouth was frowning at his assignment. He seemed like a nice enough kid.

* * *

Tavros read his assignment over again two times, frowned, then glanced over Gamzee. He got the weird quiet nerd who's always wearing face paint? Could life get any better? Tavros frowned a bit more, remembering seeing Gamzee in the halls in middle school and hearing all the rumors of what a freak and arrogant know-it-all Gamzee was. Gamzee Makara was ranked first, right above some guy named Dave Strider in terms of freakish know-it-alls. Great. Just great. Tavros thought that know-it-alls were the most annoying people that could possibly exist.

* * *

Gamzee read over the directions to the assignment silently, wondering how quickly he'd be able to complete his portion and do the collaboration portion with Tavros. They had never really talked in middle school, but Gamzee remembered seeing Tav around in the halls and had to admit now that over the summer he had gotten very cute with a blush hidden by his signature face paint. Gamzee wished now that he would've talked to Tavros back then, but it's already been passed and done.

* * *

"Hey! Asswipe!" Tavros called out with in an annoyed whisper to Gamzee. He blinked, and then pointed to himself.

"Are you referring to me?" he questioned, wondering if the adorable Hispanic boy was talking to someone else in his general direction. Tavros sighed with agitation, not really wanting to have anything to do with whom he considered a mega freak.

"Yeah, I'm talking to you!" Tavros beckoned Gamzee over. Gamzee walked over, a little confused. Did he get on this kids bad side already? This is the first they've actually talked to each other, and Gamzee was worried that he might not actually get to befriend Tavros like he initially wanted to.

"Listen, know-it-all, if we're doing this project together, we're going to do it my way. I am not taking any psycho therapist trivia questions from you, don't need any bitchin' or you dropping random, stupid facts, and you're doing the majority of the work. Got that, Makara?" Gamzee blinked at Tavros and his cute fluffy Mohawk, and could swear that under his face paint, that he was blushing. Tavros was oozing with confidence and the way he talked down to Gamzee made him feel as if he'd be fine with whatever Tavros demanded.

Tavros continued his ranting about being paired with a 'damned know-it-all' and that Gamzee should just consider himself his underling and do everything he commands until Gamzee said:

"Stop that. You're going to make me swoon." Tavros blinked in slight shock and surprise at the statement.

"Uh…what..?"

* * *

And that is the end of this rewritten first chapter. I'm nervous about how this came out, and I hope that this is better than the original. Please please please let me know in your reviews or PMs if you think the original or this rewrite is better! I would really appreciate it a lot! Also, if there's anything from the original story that you think I should leave out, edit, or add emphasis and length to in this rewrite, please point it out and let me know too! Thank you for reading, and have a nice day/ evening.


	2. Proceed: Form FriendShip&Progress Flirt

(A/N): The rewrite continues with this new chapter, and we find our characters heading towards the awareness of a second day of school! Sorry, I really like Pokemon, and the announcer of nearly every single episode aired speaks like that at the beginning and end of the episode. So, anyways, yeah, this is the second chappie. Also, I would LOVE to take in consideration the suggestion left by a guest reviewer, but I don't really know what "sea react in which Gamzee sings" means. Sorry if that's me being ignorant or if that was a typo in the review, but I don't really understand what "sea react" means. Do you mean like a scene where Gamzee reacts by singing or a suggestion for my other story? I honestly don't know. Sorry. Anyways, I'd also really like to thank you all who liked my first chapter rewrite! So, I guess I'll start replying to your reviews.

Ace of Spades: Thank you very much on your feedback and kind words! I'm happy that you find my story amazing and badass. But really, what is "sea react"? I don't know what that means. But a singing Gamzee would be cool.

LordPeanut: Thank you. Yes, that typo. Ugh. To those of you who were in confusion why the convo in fourth period suddenly switched to 'she' in the first chapter, it was suppose to say Ms. Leijon before the 'she', but for some reason, whenever I try to fix it, it still keeps getting cut out. I'll keep trying to fix it though. Also, Gamzee has Mrs. Paint first period, I noticed her name was missing too.

Disclaimer: I do not own Homestuck nor its characters.

Without further ado, onto the story!

* * *

The sun poked through the horizon of angry clouds hesitantly and the birds squawked a pitiful good morning, ruffling their feathers, and the gentle _drip drip_ _drip_ of late August showers peacefully gradually passed through; everything was peaceful in the Nitram household and it's neighborhood. That is, until the alarms began ringing. Tavros shoved Rufio by the face into the wall in a race to enter the rest room first, tripping and shoving the other; Nepeta and her elder sister glared at one another as they fought for the last bowl of cereal; Karkat, contrary wise, sat in his house reposing and leisurely sipping a cup of tea as well as watching the households of Leijon and Nitram be very noisy while his twin bustled about in a cursing panic for his school things.

* * *

~ In The Nitram Household ~

"I was up first, so I get first dibs on the bathroom!" the elder growled, trying to shove his younger sibling to the side while they struggled to enter the bathroom at the same time.

"Suck it asswipe, I touched the door first, and therefore I get the brush and gel first!" Tavros retorted while childishly sticking his tongue out at his brother. With that, he gave one ceremonious push and locked Rufio out of the bathroom.

Rufio growled in annoyance and stalked off to the kitchen, spiking Tav's omelet with a generous amount of Tabasco sauce; Tav hates spicy foods, no matter if it's even just mild. Rufio slyly grinned in satisfaction as he entered his car to head off to his morning classes at the local university as he heard Tavros spilling a stream of colorful words and the crashing of various household items while Tavros started chugging down a gallon of water; Rufio smirked evilly in his car while he drove to his classes. Tavros 412, Rufio 413. No matter. Tav would get him back later.

* * *

~ In The Leijon Household ~

Plenty of growling filled the air as the twenty five year old stared down the fourteen year old as they argued over who receives the last bowl of cereal. It was a mystery to the family as to how Muelin managed to become a teacher so young, all the while without a teaching license, but no one cared as long as she used her own money and not theirs.

"This bowl of cereal is mine!" hissed Nepeta, refusing to be intimidated by Muelin.

Muelin cranked up her glare in reply. "You wish! I was here first and grabbed the box first, so the cereal belongs to meow, not you!"

"But I'm the younger sister! You should think more often of your purrecious siblings!" Nepeta exclaimed and grabbed the box of cereal, gulped it down and grinned evilly at her sister, then ran out the door, hailing her best friend Equis to carry her to school.

* * *

~ In The Vantas Household ~

"Argh! Where the hell are my socks?!"

"Kankri, please calm down, you might give yourself another anxiety attack." Karkat tried reasoning as he drank a cup of tea and ate some toast while his twin tore their room upside down searching for a pair of socks.

"Don't tell me what to do!" Kankri yelled at the calm Karkitty, who was only trying to be nice. Kankri grinned in triumph as held up a pair of socks and quickly put them on.

"Do you want some tea?" Karkat asked politely, holding out a cup he had prepared before hand for his brother. Kankri silently took it with a 'Hmph' and sipped it gingerly while glaring out the window.

"You're a man of few words when you're not angry." Karkat mused as he finished his tea. Kankri glared but Karkat just smiled in return and tidied the room before they left for the bus stop together.

* * *

Upon entering school this chilly morning, the neighbors of the Nitram neighborhood greeted each other discreetly before heading off to their already determined morning hang-out spots. Tavros wondered how they could already pick a spot to hang-out in every morning with their select group of friends already, it was only the second day of school today; well, it didn't really matter to him, but he still felt childishly upset as he headed to the cafeteria for breakfast to try and make up for the nasty prank Rufio pulled.

This was a small town, so nearly everyone knows each other; they had all been to the same middleschool and elementary school, and might've even had the same classes together year after consecutive year. So it wasn't surprising to Tavros when a few older jocks called him over to sit at the 'popular' table with them. He declined though, not really wanting anything to do with them and just wanting as much of a peaceful morning as he could get. However, it seemed life would not be merciful to him as John Egbert approached, the king above kings of cool. As well as pranking. Don't forget the pranking; they were more harmful than good though. Many kids were weary of John and tried their best not to get on his bad side.

"Hey Nitram." John nonchalantly greeted, sitting across from him. Tavros mutely nodded in reply, just wanting to be left alone to eat his crappy cafeteria food of actually not half bad toast and cheesy omelette.

"So…I heard that you get all the bitches, correct?" John inquired with a lifted eyebrow. Tavros couldn't help but smirk arrogantly.

"Yeah. They can't resist the Mohawk and Nitram charm." Tavros replied after swallowing a bite of toast.

"Does getting bitches include causing guys to swoon too?" John asked, leaning a little closer so nosy passerby wouldn't hear. Tavros frowned, a bit bewildered by that suggestion.

"No man, Tavros Nitram does not roll that way!" Tav quickly retorted; he then thought about Gamzee's statement the previous day and his frown deepened. "I didn't do anything to that weird-ass Makara, I don't even know what I did. Shit, I don't even want anything to do with that smart ass."

John sighed with disappointment at Tavros' answer, and then glanced around to make sure again that no one was listening, and then whispered:

"I can't seem to charm that damned Strider." Tav blinked. John, the king of kings of cool and pranksters was talking to him...because he wanted flirting advice on how to make Dave Strider, who was nearly as much of a know-it-all as Gamzee, to swoon for him. Wonders never cease to amaze him.

"Uh, well…I didn't know you batted for the other team, Egderp…uh..." Tav was slowly backing away now with his styrofoam tray, using the empty tray as a slow and awkward means to escape the subject. The first bell rang for first period, and Tavros used that as a secondary excuse, and shot off.

"See ya later, Egderp!" he yelled as he ran into the safety of the growing mass of students heading to their classes. It wasn't that Tavros was a homophobe, no, not at all; he just found the thought of dating a guy unappealing. Couldn't they just beat the crap out of you if you did something they didn't like, such as the jocks commonly found in his high school? Girls weren't any different. Girls always threw themselves at him if he ever said he was lonely, but none of them actually seem to hold romantic feelings for him. Tavros secretly admitted that that made him a bit upset at times. What was the point of having Nitram charm and an awesome Mohawk if the girl only fell for your body and not your personality? Another secret Tav held was that he enjoyed romantic things, but he'd never admit that aloud to anyone. Tavros decided to shove aside all those troublesome thoughts and somewhat paid attention to what his homeroom teacher was saying.

* * *

John sighed and headed to homeroom, pondering ways to try and make Dave, his best yet nerdy friend, fall for him; a flustered Dave Strider stumbled to his first period honors class late, having untintentionally overheard the earlier conversation between John and Tavros, despite John's attempt to try and make sure no one could eavesdrop. To Dave's credit, John's voice is a tad bit loud, so it made it easy for people to eavesdrop on their conversation. Well, at least he knew now why John was talking weirdly to him last week when Dave returned from vacation with his elder brother. Dave distractedly handed in the work the teacher asked for, wondering why John would ever fall for someone as uncool as himself. Dave considered himself a lame nerd, the snide comments of many bullies years past embedded into his mind; the bright side is that John is actually a homosexual contrary to what John is always saying. Dave sighed and rubbed his temples, attempting to focus on the work handed out by his teahcer. It seems that honors teachers decided to give work without delay. The poor migraine suffering Strider decided to push aside the complexities of his feelins and sort them out later. It's not like he reciprocated John's feelings, right?

_"Don't be silly."_ Dave thought to himself. _"It's not like John was being serious anyways. Right? Probably just messing around..."_

* * *

It was now fourth period, and all Gamzee wanted to do was try and discuss the project with Tavros, but the shorter boy seemed to keep awkwardly ignoring him every time he tried talking to him. Gamzee frowned and sat back in his seat in agitated defeat, wondering what he did wrong. Did he accidentally put on his face paint wrong this morning? That didn't seem to be the case, as everyone always game him the same odd look even if he had applied the face paint correctly. Seriously, what did he do? The poor clown gentlemen had absolutely no clue, and as Ms. Leijon really did not care what so ever what they did in her class as long as they didn't bother her at all, they could pretty much whatever they wanted. So, taking the hall pass, he gave one last glance at Tavros with a rather evident frown, and headed to the school library.

Glancing around the nearly deserted library, Gamzee quickly found himself a comfy seat in his favorite section of the library: historical studies and fiction. Coincidentally, it was right next to the engineering section, and he found himself in the company of his decade long academic rival, Dave Strider. Gamzee glared, Dave tried to maintain a poker face, and as usual, failed, letting out an unmanly squeak of fear. They didn't really hate each other, but their rivalry was fierce, and Gamzee was a bit upset and disappointed at Dave for placing third in the highest scores for testing last year intead of second, or even taking Gamzee's throne of first place. Gamzee stopped glaring though when he noticed that something seemed to be bothering Dave thought.

"…Strider, is something troubling you?" Gamzee politely asked, concern for his rival for obviously present in his eyes. Dave jumped at the sudden question and dropped his book on his foot clumsily, quickly scooped it back up, and nervously looked up the tall superior smarty pants.

"J-just overthinking is all. I-ironic, right?" he stuttered out, unconvincingly. He always seemed to use irony as a front to shield his feelings.

Gamzee was clearly not buying his answer, and loomed over the blonde with an unconvinced look and death glare, trying to intimidate the answer of him.

"Okay, okay, I'll talk!" he exclaimed, turning away from Gamzee's scary glare. "I was eating breakfast and heard Tavros talking with John, and John was trying to get flirting tips from Tavros so he can charm me! I thought he was just messing with me or something over the summer break!" No wonder he was so flustered. The coolest guy in school was trying to flirt with him.

"Oh, and, uh, I heard Tav say that he thinks that you're weird…um, he really doesn't want anything to do with you, Gamz…" Dave nervously added; he winced a little at seeing how Gamzee seemed to deflate. Now he understood why Tavros kept awkwardly avioding him.

_"I see...I guess Tavros is just like the other children from middle school..."_ Gamzee thought sourly.

"Um, maybe he isn't the right one for you..?" Dave attempted to console him, having seen how Gamzee had blatantly already started developing a crush on Tavros, but quickly stopped at seeing how that seemed to make Gamzee more upset. The crush must have been a strong one.

"Well, uh, m-maybe he'll come around, eventually, i-if you try to keep talking to him…" he attempted. It seemed to give Gamzee new determination. Gamzee lifted his head after thinking through that. Maybe his rapidly developing crush on Tav wouldn't get in the way of at least trying to be friends with Tavros.

* * *

Tavros knew his awkward ignorance of Gamzee was childish, but he really had no idea how to start, or even maintain conversation with the studious Makara. With a twinge of slight guilt, he continued to awkwardly ignore Gamzee by reading the instructions to their project for the hundreth time while Gamzee frowned at him and left the classroom.

_"Where's he going?"_ Tav wondered, putting down the paper after Gamzee left for the library. He sighed and stared at the cieling, thinking of how he been rudely talking of Gamzee this morning, and how he had been rude to him yesterday. As he thought, he realized that Gamzee was not acting like those know-it-alls that Tavros hated so much, but Gamzee was actually being quite the gentlemen and was rather polite to Tavros, despite Tav's initial rudeness. The twinge of guilt returned to Tavros a bit strong, and Tav frowned. Well, maybe the tall nerd wouldn't be that bad afterall, even if he had said that weird comment yesterday. Tavros guessed it couldn't hurt to try and be friends with Gamzee, and that it was rather stupid of him to not talk to him and not want anything to do with him for just a few minor differences between the two. So, when Gamzee returned to the classroom and initiated a conversation with Tavros, Tav hesitated at first, and then willingly replied, and the two learned interesting things about the other.

* * *

_"Hopefully it won't end badly for him like the last guy…"_ Dave thought, watching Gamzee run out the library. At least he was of help to his rival. It felt nice to be of someone who didn't think he was just an arrogant smart ass. Sighing with resignation, Dave proceeded to continue re-shelving books, and involuntarily flinched when a masculine arm slid around his waist. Too afraid that it was Eridan again, he held his breath.

"Hey Dave…" John whispered, attempting and horribly failing at a flirtatious tone. Oh good, it wasn't Eridan. Wait, John is even worse! Cue the ultra adorable flustered expression and stuttered reply.

"Uh, h-hey Egbert."

John graciously pulled Dave close, smirking in satisfaction as the stuttered reply. This was progress, no? Well, he at least hoped so. Dave squirmed, a bit of a flustered mess with John's arms around his waist.

"U-uh, Egbert, I, uh, trying to, book..." Dave glared at the ground, face tinted a light pink. He couldn't even form proper sentences, thanks to John simply laying an arm around his waist. John's smirk broadened. Did Dave just blush? Because of him? Yes, this was progress. Progress indeed.

* * *

That is the end of the second re-written chapter. It is lengthier than I thought it would be, so I hope you all enjoyed the extra length that normally isn't evident in my writing. Yay, lots of relationship developments! As I had said before in chapter one, a few things would be repeated, so I hope you all didn't have too much de-ja vu. Luckily, I didn't have to go to school, so I had time to write this, but I also have to study a lot today. Boo. Anyways, if you want to leave a suggestion to any future developments in this story to improve it, feel free, and if you have request for a story, go ahead and ask. However, I will **not** write anything rated M. Shit, I really need to update The Adventures of GamCat...followers of that story, please don't be mad...I'll update it soon...maybe today... Okay, well, have a nice day/evening wherever you are, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


End file.
